• Madison James

Learn What 99% Of Men DON'T Know About Touch

I've just spent the last 6 days attending a workshop in Portugal with Betty Martin dedicated to unravelling the complex mysteries of the world of touch, and I still feel like I have only just scratched the surface.

During this workshop, I was fortunate enough to be surrounded by professional bodyworkers, sex therapists, erotic massage practitioners, sex workers, BDSM madams, relationship councillors and many others from diverse backgrounds who were all able to add their own unique perspective. There are many new insights that I could share but there's one in particular that I think is extremely relevant to us as escorts as it's an area that is easily overlooked.

One of the skills that will instantly help to distinguish you from 99% of other men is understanding the art of touch. Many have never stopped to think about the true dynamic of what takes place when one person touches another in an intimate setting. To understand this we first need to ask the question “who is it for?” This may seem like an obvious question to answer but when we really look at it, touch is often used as a bridge to an intimate encounter rather than a genuine and complete pleasure in of itself.

If touch is used as a tool to help you get from A to B, then it's mainly for you, not the client, and there is a whole spectrum that they may never really get to appreciate. This is a shame because it's a spectrum that can be so intense that it can create the most sublime sensation your client may have ever experienced.

When you touch and caress with the sole purpose of pleasing your client this can create a completely different dynamic where you can take your time and tune in to their every desire. You may be more inclined to communicate and ask questions to gauge the level of pleasure and arousal. You can pay attention to every stroke, every lick and every kiss because there is no A to B, there is only the present, right now, in the moment.

Similarly, at the other end of the spectrum, you may decide to give your body to your client to touch purely for her pleasure, and this too is also a fantastic area to explore. So long as the context is clear and mutual consent has been given, you will both be able to embrace your desires to the fullest extent.

Touch for most of the women I encounter is one of the main forms of affection that they miss. There are a number of reasons why this may be the case, perhaps it's due to a busy work schedule, a neglectful partner or perhaps a lack of suitable candidates. Whatever the case may be, we are social beings and tactile touch is an essential element of what makes us human.

The fingertips contain one of the highest amounts of nerve endings anywhere on the body and humans are believed to possess the most sensitive areas of skin anywhere in the animal kingdom.

This gives us the ability to tune in to the client's every move, every involuntary twitch, every spasm of delight and learn how to dial them up beyond anything that they may have experienced before.

Something that my clients tend to enjoy massively is when I lay them flat on their back and run one finger from the side of the neck, slowly down the chest, past the stomach and all the way along the inner thigh to the ankles. I avoid all erogenous zones initially but I pay particular attention to how she responds when touched in certain areas. Sometimes I'll ask her to guide me to where she wants to be touched and then I'll hold out just before I reach that point to build anticipation.

I may repeat this over and over again until the arousal and frustration become overwhelming. Giving her what she wants doesn't always mean giving it to her whenever she wants it. Sometimes it's good to make her work for it a little as she'll enjoy it a lot more if her dials have been turned up slowly.

According to a recent experiment by Canadian Scientist:

For light touch, the neck, forearm, and vaginal margin are the most sensitive areas, and the areola is the least sensitive. When it comes to pressure, the clitoris and nipple are the most sensitive, and the side boob and abdomen are the least. Time

There are many ways that you may choose to explore the amazing world of touch whether it's with a client, a partner or on your own - I think the important thing to do is approach with a level of curiosity and an open mind. Much of what we do is a learning process which is not always easy to admit because we are paid to be experts. This is true but no matter how experienced we may be, there is always room to grow and always more to learn. A true professional acknowledges this and takes pride in the journey, and not just the final destination.

Explore, learn, grow, evolve.

If you'd like to gain a better understanding of the dynamic of touch I definitely recommend checking out Betty Martin's work on 'The Wheel Of Consent'.

We'll talk again soon.

Your friend,


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© 2019 Madison James Consulting